My life is not my own

Just yesterday I was sitting in the most darling little coffee shop with a full day ahead of me. I found the perfect spot next to the window with an outlet. I was plugged in, with my papers spread and my yummy latte sitting there. I let out a sigh, I was ready to get some things checked off my list. It was finally quiet ... my list was waiting and I was ready.

“Excuse me, we need a witness to sign our marriage certificate,” a sweet little voice said from behind.

It took a moment for me to realize she was serious. Once I comprehended, I quickly left my latte and list of plans and went to sign their marriage certificate. I have quite the imagination so I was imagining all the reasons why they were in a coffee shop, getting married. Trust me, my imagination made up things that would be worthy of a Hallmark movie. Regardless of the story, I was thrilled I got to play a tiny part. 

I left those starry-eyed lovers and sat back down with my best laid plans for the day. My previous plans seemed far less as daunting than they did fifteen minutes prior. And then my mind turned to orphan care. Whatever part we play in orphan care, it usually disrupts our best laid plans. It takes us out of our comfort zone and asks us to connect with the idea that this life is not our own. 

When we set aside our agendas and dare to look into the eyes of a child we learn that this life is not our own. Though their eyes are not usually starry and the story we step into is more of a Lifetime movie than a Hallmark one. And even when our journey with them takes longer than planned or isn’t as long as we hoped, we learn that this life is not our own. 

If we make it about us and try to hold onto our plans and our expectations, we will be sorely disappointed. And when we get to the place where we can surrender to the idea that my life is not my own, God is able to come in and fill those unknown, frightful spaces with grace, favor, and hope. 

So listen for the request to put your plans aside. When you hear that voice ask, I pray we all remember that my life is not my own. 

“My life is not my own

To you I belong

I give myself away

So you can use me.”

~ William McDowell